Yeh you guys don't have to read this.. I'm basically talking to myself here.

I remember Snowy when he was no bigger than my foot. It was mid-January and my dad came home with our puppy's belongings in his arms. I could see a crate, dog bowl, dog food... but no puppy. Me and my brothers were running around looking for the puppy he was supposed to bring home, but to no avail. Seeing my dad grin like mad made us know that the puppy was nearby. As me and my two brothers gathered around him, a tiny nose poked out from under my dad's jacket. It was no other than my soon-to-be best friend, Snowy.

Like all Eskies are, Snowy was very intelligent. His breed is pretty popular to perform in circuses actually.. doing tricks that included tightrope walking x_O So when he wasn't housebroken yet, pissing everywhere like mad, we put newspaper on a plastic mat. Everytime he made a mess, we'd drag him over to the mat and point at it, sternly telling him 'no'. And on the fourth time, he got it.. and from then on, he could pee indoors. Snowy's a very quick learner. He knew how to "shake-a-paw" in 15 minutes. Knew how to lie down in a day's lesson.

The best memory I had of him was when he was about 12 months old, I locked him in my room cuz I just wanted to play with him. He was lying there sleeping, then I lied on top of him, thinking that's what puppies do when they're sleeping. I still kept my body weight off him though. I was tired of holding myself up so I myself, layed on my stomach. A few seconds later, he layed on top of my back o_____O It was the CUTEST thing ever and I didn't want to ruin it so I just layed there trying not to breathe so hard xD

Anyway, he was born with a lot of excitement. Snowy was permitted only in the kitchen, a door and a low fence keeps him from getting out. Everytime someone enters the kitchen, he'd grab your sleeve and play tug-o-war with it.

Now the adolescent spirit in his eyes were wiped clear. After moving from Thornhill to RichmondHill, house rules were stricter and he was basically ignored. The most he'd get was a walk a week. I live in an abusive household so like us, my dog was also abused.. this enraged his anger into biting. He didn't trust any strangers so anyone who didn't live with him, he'd attack. On rare cases, he'd bite even me, but he'd quickly lick my fingers to let me know he's sorry.

The scariest moment and soon-to-be recognized as a symptom of his death, was his heart attack. He was wandering back and forth in front of the TV my dad was watching when all of a sudden, he shot upstairs (he wasn't allowed upstairs) into my room and under the bed. I looked under wondering what was wrong and he did what looked like a seizure - his back against the floor and legs stiff against the underside of my bed, shaking around. I was so terrified, I didn't know what to do.. I think I started crying at one point, calling my dad. By the time my dad came upstairs, Snowy was fine.. he was breathing heavily under my bed still, but ran back downstairs to join my dad. I didn't think it was that serious so I let that go. Snowy was 5 years old at that time.

After moving from 2 more different houses, Snowy became ignored more than ever. My parents didn't want him in the house anymore because they wanted to keep the house tidy and hair-free. So in return of still keeping the dog, he was only allowed in the small laundry room and garage. He spent most of his days outside.

In the start of July 2004, he started coughing in the middle of his bathtime. It wasn't just a normal cough though, he would cough ALL the time. After I came back from Vancouver, I took him to the vet and she said he has a heart murmur. To find out what medication he needed, they would have to go through ultrasound and other technical machinery testing. The price would be over $800 (not including the medicine). It would not have lengthen his life span, just reduce the pain and aid the heart. My parents refused to pay for him since he was already at 9 years old and his time has come.

So being the selfish person that I was, I let Snowy endure all that pain. Everytime he started coughing, he doesn't stop. He didn't get much sleep from it either cuz it was difficult for him to lie down (the fluid that gets trap in his lungs keeps him from breathing). All Snowy did was breathe carbon dioxide in the garage he sleeps in. He was filthy. Nobody played with him. It was only during heartfelt moments I'd let him in the piano room when no one's home and play the piano for him which eased the pain. He sits either next to me on the piano bench or under the piano. Snowy loved listening to me and my brother play. He loved music.

His case worsened month by month. He was deteriating before my eyes and I didn't do anything. I had the money, but it was basically my life's savings. What I didn't have was a heart. The thought of putting him down was terrifying for me. Why was it so hard for me, I don't know, I hardly even see him due to the time he spends outside.

November 27th 2004, Snowy passed away. My uncle found him lying dead on his side in the garage with his eyes half open and foam coming out of his mouth and nose. His head was tucked in and one of his paws were digging against the floor showing the pain he suffered. When I saw him, I burst into tears. His eyes screamed at me as if he was trying so hard not to die.

So me and my brothers solemly pushed him into a garbage bag and my mom drove us to drop him off at the Toronto Humane Society. As my brother and I carried Snowy inside, people were staring at the bodybag. In the corner, a dog was under a man's leg.. trembling, and in the other corner, a petition signing desk to legalize Pit Bulls. Dogs from the pound were barking in the background as the lady told my mom we don't get to keep Snowy's ashes. Someone held the door open for me as I walked out.

RIP: Snowy [unknown birthdate 1993 - Nov 27 2004]
I love you, boy.